“I told him to lock the door? He never listened. He was in such a tearing hurry to jump on me. Now you know where it landed us?” Pramila said agitatedly. I looked questioningly at her husband, Pradeep. “The other day, my 7years old son barged into the bedroom, when we are sexually intimate”explained Pradeep, sheepishly. “Relax, what is bothering you?” I queried.
“The kid actually walked in on us and asked my wife to get off me! He wanted to sit on my lap! What do I do? How do I handle such an awkward situation?”
“Tell your child – no way. It’s your mom’s seat,” I suggested on a light note.
While this may be an optimistic approach, many couples live in this constant fear and tension that their kids might actually catch them in the act.
What if a child comes charging into your bedroom while you are in the heights of ecstasy? What do you say if they see “something’?
The ground rule is “to lock the door, before you start”. However if you are caught with your pants down, thenext step depends on the age of the child. If he’s a preschooler, attach as much normalcy as possible to whatever the child saw. Remove the actions, if possible, from any sexual aspects, because at that age they don’t really understand it. Put it in terms of hugging or wrestling, but if the child is, say 10years or older, allow the child to ask whatever the child wants to If the child does not ask you anything or just runs away from the room it is possible that he’s trying to hide his confusion or just wants to get away from something that he perceives to be unpleasant or abnormal. Call the child back into the room. Ask, him why he ran away. You know the answer, but it gets them talking. Try to control your own agitation and discomfort.Say, ‘let’s talk’.
Some parents get edgy about this topic. They have vague fears that such scenes might emotionally harm their child for life. Hardly. In fact, the belief that you’d be permanently damaging your kids if they ever caught you making love is unfounded and puritanical. When quizzed about the attitudes that they wanted to convey to their kids, many parents said they didn’t want to pass along the guilt they felt, the logic that sex is “dirty”. But isn’t that exactly what you teach if you’re so afraid to be caught? And if you were caught, a flipped-out reaction on your part would be far more damaging.